Fucking memories.

Usually, I like memories - but not when they're bad. Sometimes, I can't help but think about the bad things, because something brings it up in me. I was browsing MySpace and I came across someone's pictures of a night he went out without me, a night that I really needed him.

It was a week before my birthday. I remember he told me he couldn't hang out with me because he had stuff he "needed" to do, so I could just call him and talk to him. I was freaking out about my math placement test the next day because I knew I had to place high, or I'd be stuck in school for ages longer than I had planned. It didn't help that I was running a fever and I wasn't even sure if I'd feel okay enough to go the next day. Needless to say, I already felt like shit. So I started texting him, and what I get back are half-assed, one-word messages.

A half-assed "Aww I'm sorry" doesn't make a person feel better, if you hadn't caught on.

So I called him, and where is he? While he's supposedly out doing something he NEEDED to do, more important than making sure I didn't have a nervous breakdown?

Two words: Cosmic Bowling.

And of course, when he's with his friends, he won't make himself look like a wimp by being nice to his girlfriend. Of course.

But I was pissed - first at him, then his friends. He could have gone home, said it was important - real friends would have understood. But instead, I don't even know if he said he had to go home or not. They even went out to eat afterwards. I couldn't forgive him for a pretty long time after that, because he promised that he'd stop hanging out with ______, and just kept breaking that promise time and time again.

Truth be told, I can honestly and genuinely say that I hate one of them in particular, though I won't name names. I think he's the biggest asshole that I've met in my entire life. It got so bad that I told Erik that if this particular person was invited to our wedding, he could go get married by himself.

I'd like to say I'm past it, but if we're being completely honest, I don't want that dickface anywhere near Erik - near my fiance - ever again. He's been the cause of so many fights, I'm tired of it. He's such a dick, and it would rub off on Erik whenever they were around each other because Erik didn't really fit with them otherwise. Erik and I are finally happy now - and if ______ stays the fuck away, we can probably stay that way.