Alrighty guys - life's been hectic, so my blog's been a bit inactive, but I think I'm going to be able to blog once in a while again. Maybe. :P
Anyway, since it's New Year's Eve, I decided that instead of posting the cliche old New Year's resolutions, I'd put up my soundtrack of the year 2008.
1. "Longer" - Dan Fogelberg
"Stronger than any mountain cathedral
Truer than any tree ever grew
Deeper than any forest primeval
I am in love with you"
I thought this song was appropriate, since getting married this year, I realized that being alone doesn't make you strong; it takes a different kind of strength altogether to need someone, to admit and submit to the fact that you love them with all your being.
2. "Keeps Getting Better" - Christina Aguilera
"So baby yes I know what I am
And no I don't give a damn
And you'll be loving it."
I think this year, I discovered that I don't have to be a nice person all the time, but that I have my own brand of being not-so-nice. I'm not usually the kind of person who will take issue to anyone, but if someone starts with me, I've finally started respecting myself enough to speak up - and to my surprise, it makes me seem more real to myself and others.
3. "Everchanging" - Rise Against
"There's nothing simple when it comes to you and I,
Always something in this everchanging life
And it probably always will."
This song isn't really about Erik and me, but just about things in general - this time last year, I would have never expected this to be my life. There have been times that I've just had to let everything slide and keep going instead of being stubborn and insisting things would change when they clearly wouldn't.
4. "Consider This" - Anna Nalick
"My mind is soaked in words
I've come to terms with all my insecurities
And purity's no friend of mine."
I suppose now, I'm just reiterating something I've said earlier, but it's probably one of the most important lessons I've gotten out of 2008. This year has made me a lot more self-secure, a lot more introspective, more critical of everything, and more willing to speak my mind. Not a bad deal.
5. "Lucky" - Jason Mraz and Colbie Caillat
"I'm lucky we're in love in every way
Lucky to have stayed where we have stayed
Lucky to be coming home someday."
I'll be straight about it - Erik and I have had HARD times this past year, trying to make this long distance thing work. But I think Erik, more than anything, has taught me to appreciate the time we DO have together, and to appreciate the things we're able to share, instead of the things we aren't.
6. "Ready to Fall" - Rise Against
"Perpetual motion the image wont focus
A blur is all that's seen
But here in this moment like the eye of the storm
It all came clear to me."
I just don't think any soundtrack woud be complete without the song that I've identified with ever since after graduation, when things started to go completely nuts. I think that (excuse the French) all the shit needed to hit the fan so I could learn more about myself, and while it hasn't been enjoyable and I'm not sure if I've made myself any better, I've made a lot of choices and I'm willing to accept what they've made of my life.
7. "So Close" - Jon McLaughlin
"We're so close
To reaching that famous happy ending
Almost believing this one's not pretend
Let's go on, on dreaming for we know we are
So close
So close
And still so far"
This song was basically how I felt every time Erik and I had to say goodbye at an airport - I get those few days of being together dangled in front of me, and then it gets pulled away every time. A lot of people asked me how I handle it, and I honestly don't know HOW I do it, only WHY.
8. "Time Well Spent" - Tom Felton
"And I've no idea where that day gone when
Yet I know that it's time well spent."
Ok. So this is Draco Malfoy from Harry Potter singing and I'm a little biased, but this song REALLY got me when I heard it. There've been a lot of times where I've thought, "What the **** am I doing?" because I spend more time than I ought to at home, instead of out with friends, and I lose track of all that time, but to be honest, I wouldn't spend my time any other way.
9. "Whatever Bitch" - Mya
"I worked too freakin' hard
To let a hater bring me down
And we ain't sweatin' you
What goes around comes back around."
This song is dedicated to quite a few people this year, actually, who don't need to be named. I've gotten a lot os BS this year for refusing to put up with people, at school and elsewhere, and eventually, you get to the point where you and the the people close to you just laugh and let it bounce right off of you.
10. "She Ain't Got That Boom Like I Do" - Blaque
"She ain't got that boom like I do
And she don't move the room like I do
And she ain't got the junk in her trunk
Or the bump that you want
And the girl ain't got the moves like I do."
I'm sorry, but I just had to include a song dedicated to the person without whom I wouldn't be quite as confident in myself as I am today. For me, it took meeting (well, not iterally MEETING) a person so insecure and desperate to realize how much I have to offer. I realize it's not a bad thing to recognize the things about yourself that are enviable along with your faults, and not to let a pallid skank who's so skinny that she looks pre-pubescent make you feel bad about yourself. =)
Happy New Year! Let's do 2009 big!
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